Lyric courtesy of the great Canadian band Rush.
I sent myself into self-imposed blog exile over the weekend. Partly because I was in the aforementioned snarky mood, but also because I had a fight with TFYO the weekend previous which gave me pause.
My husband works Monday through Friday, 4:30 a.m. to around noon every day. He's usually home on the weekends, unless he has a live appearance to put in, and then half the time he takes TFYO with him, because she's such a hit at remotes. I work Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays from 2 until 5 p.m., and on weekends from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. See where the problem is here?
A couple of weeks ago, Ray had a remote to go to late Saturday evening, so it was going to be just me and TFYO at home. She was not happy. I tried to explain that Daddy would be home around her bedtime, but she argued with me.
"No he won't. He won't be home at all. And then you'll be going to work tomorrow morning, and I'll be all alone!"
I tried to calmly explain that no one would leave her alone, but she was inconsolable and burst out with this:
"You're always at work. You work seven days a week!"
Ouch.
It's not really true, but the more I thought about it, the more I saw what she meant. I'm not usually home when she is. The days I have off, she's in school most of the day. We almost never get to spend a weekend together as a family. And that realization hurt. Ray and I have always set up our work schedules so one of us would be home with TFYO. Now, I'm not needed to watch her in the morning, and I'm not home when she is, so she's spending most of her time with Ray.
So, I'm giving up working on Saturdays, and blogging on the weekend. My boss (one of three, actually!) was not really happy. About the work thing, I don't think he cares about the blogging. But I 've made up my mind that the money I'd make from four hours work on a Saturday is not worth having my child resent me being gone. It also means I get one day a week to sleep in (a little anyway), and I get to see my husband from sunup to sundown occasionally, too.
This coming Saturday is my first one off of work. I think we'll go to the beach.
12 comments:
Good for you! It's sometimes hard to make the break but I bet in a bit, you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.
P.S. Sorry about the monitor.
Great idea Jen. Everyone's a winner - Hot Chocolate lyric, doncha know!
Mya x
Oh, the guilt of motherhood. It is amazing how such a little person can make you feel like hell. Too bad TFYO isn't old enough to understand that some kids only see their parents a few hours a day if they are lucky.
Jessica still resents that I went back to work when she was 9.
Just do what makes you happy and comfortable, and if staying home on the weekends is it then good for you!
Sounds like a good plan. I work at night and my wife works during the day so we try and make Saturdays our day together as a family, and it works out pretty good.
Yeah but wait a second. What about us?
First, I am impressed that a four year old know there are seven days in a week! She is brilliant and practical. For what it's worth, I think you are making a good decision. Have you seen the t-shirts that say even a bad day at the beach beats a good day at work? Have a great time at the beach on Saturday!!
Now that my two are teenagers, I really miss the pre-school years. I loved those days, and I think we all miss them. I'm glad you are going to enjoy them while you can.
You'll get to sleep in? I'm jealous!
Even if you don't sleep in I think that's a good decision.
Oh yeah, I'm jealous about the beach too.
It will be 40 and raining here this weekend.
yes, good for you. and i've quit blogging on sundays, because there's too much else to do. and doug said, "i used to have a wife. now i have a blogger!"
and i figured he was my important than that seventh blog of the week....
Good for you! Your bosses can go soak their heads.
Missed this one somehow Jen but yay. Have a ab time with tfyo and we'll see you Monday when you can tell us all about it. x
We've also worked out our schedules the same way and that is no doubt the downside. We're almost never all home at once.
And kids and guilt? How do they DO that??
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