Sitting in our living room yesterday the following conversation ensues:
Me: Honey, I know money is tight. But I think I want to have another baby.
Him: Well, okay. How do we go about doing that?
Me: (30 seconds of hysterical laughter)
Me: (through tears of laughter) Well, dear, first a daddy loves a mommy very much...
This is actually something we've been talking about a bit in the last few months. There's still a lot that needs to be done around the house, but The Four Year Old will soon be the The Five Year Old, and if I'm going to have another baby I should probably do it sooner rather than later.It also seems like everyone around me is pregnant. My husband's cousin is expecting another baby (and, boy, didn't we hear about that!), a coworker of ours recently told me she's pregnant, a friend of mine told me his soon-to-be wife is "in the family way", and everywhere I look it's like there are bulging tummies surrounding me on all sides.
TFYO was not planned. She was a honeymoon baby, and I found out I was pregnant in the middle of a lot of turmoil at work, and things were rough after she was born. But I can't help but think that if I keep "planning" for the next one, the next one might not happen.
5 comments:
Bear in mind who this is coming from, okay? But having three kids -one planned, one fertility treatment and one oops - I can honestly say that (in our case anyway) it didn't make a damned bit of difference in terms of how we were able to handle them. Money will always be tight when you have kids, whether you have one or ten. Time will always be a crunch and your loyalties will always be torn. Your offspring will ensure that, no matter how many you have.
People always told me not to let time and money be such huge factors in having kids and it made me really mad. I wanted to ask if they would take care of my kids and pay my bills if I went splat from the pressure. But in hindsight they were right. Things really do work out. Life is expandable.
Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith. I've never regretted a second of it.
I was going to say something profound and wise but suddenly realised we never quite knew what we were doing: Had one baby (Brainbox); 4 years later Princess Perfect arrived.
There's never a perfect time to have a baby or another one. It just sort of happens and you muddle through.
I think Rotten Correspondent has nailed it, though, especially with:
"Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith. I've never regretted a second of it."
Hear, hear!
I'm completely with RC and Dumdad.
Miss E was a honeymoon/new house baby, Miss M came along when Miss E was nearly four and a half, and both times were mad, hard, amazing, funny, awful and perfect.
Go for it.
The first hint I was pregnant was that I couldn't get enough air through the dust mask when my husband and I began stripping the paint off the wood work in our dining room. He finished sanding the room the day before I gave birth. We finally finished staining and varnishing the wood in that room when our babies were 21 months old. We finished the rest of the woodwork when they were around six, maybe. They slept in a room that was a converted sun porch until they were seven and we were able to make a proper bedroom. They are fifteen now, and I still have a list of things that need to be done--and if I am lucky when I get home the contractor will have been by to start one of them! Anyway, my point is, there is never a "right" time, the house will ALWAYS need something. If you want to have another baby, you don't really need a reason, just go ahead and have one!!
I remember when lela and I decided it was time for a baby. When I told him about it, I expected my dad to give me a big lecture about waiting until I had a better job, our financial situation was better, blah, blah, blah. But I was surprised and delighted when all he said was, "It's about time!" Both of our kids were planned, pretty much, sort of, but to say we were ready would be highly inaccurate. Nobody is ever really ready for that. However, you seem to be as ready as anyone I've ever heard of!! Good luck with whatever happens, my friend.
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